Shoes
by blu-waffle
Summary: Crack!oneshot based upon Zack and Kunsel finding the song 'Shoes' by Liam Kyle Sullivan. What can I say, Genesis loves shoes.


A/N: Hello everyone and welcome to my first FFVII fic, and a crack!fic at that. This fic has been rated M due to some minor language (and very very minor mature themes, but I mean, you need a microscope and a yaoi mind to find it!) and has been brought to you by the fun that is my mind. In order to understand this fic, you need to be accquainted with the song 'Shoes' by Liam Kyle Sullivan (it's on Youtube), and I know that it's a very old internet craze now, but ideas arrive as and when they like, damn them *shakes fist*. Hope you enjoy!  
Disclaimer: All lyrics belong to 'Shoes' by Liam Kyle Sullivan. All characters are from Final Fantasy VII (Crisis Core and others), and belong to Square Enix. (It's the only place where they can do something useful....although sex slaves/models are useful too, in their own way :3)

* * *

Zack loved the internet. It had brought him many joyous things over the past few years; the fan pages for the Three Generals of the Shinra Army (he was now a moderator for each, and even had a special page all to himself on Angeal's site – ah, the perks of being his student), eBay, and....the homepage of the Honeybee Inn – but if Angeal ever finds out, he swears to god that Kunsel is to blame. But this...this was something in a whole league of its own. He glanced over at his friend's face, not covered by his helmet for once, and silently watched him mouth the words along with the song with the same look of amazement.

"Let's get some shoes! Let's get some shoes! Oh my god shoes, oh my god shoes, oh –my –god- shoes!"

This was legendary. When Kunsel had invited him over to his quarters earlier, he certainly hadn't been expecting them to find something as awesome as this. The video finished again for about the seventh time (Zack had lost count after the fourth), and he turned away from the screen completely.

"How did you find this?"

Kunsel smiled and replied "I heard some of the thirds talking about it on the way to Tactics."

Zack nodded, his spikes bouncing slightly with the movement. "It seems we have much to learn from the young ones."

That earned him a cushion to the face and a snort from Kunsel, leaving Zack to splutter in indignation before launching a counter-attack complete with his own special brand of war cry.

"Ow-ow-owwwwwwwwwww!" (That's meant to be a dog howl...somehow....).

Kunsel duly responded with "I'm gonna betchslap you, shitbag!" making Zack laugh and shout "No, I'm an athlete!" as he chased Kunsel around the couch, wielding a cushion.

Unfortunately for Zack, who had so far beaten Kunsel across the living room after realising that pillows couldn't really withstand using Buster Sword techniques and duly changing tactics, the ringtone of his PHS called him back over to the couch.

"Y'ello?"

"Yellow is a colour, not a way of greeting, Zack."

Zack instantly recognised the smooth voice of Genesis, and huffed a laugh in reply.

"Where are you?"

"I'm hanging out at Kunsel's at the moment, why?"

There was muffled conversation from the other end of the line, obviously from where Genesis had put his hand over the receiver, before he returned.

"Angeal says you can bring him too. He wants you to help him carry some boxes. Come to your quarters."

The line clicked off and Zack was left to stand. _Boxes of what? And why are they in my apartment? Meh, better go check it out. _

"Yo, Kunsel – we gotta go. Angeal and Genesis want help moving boxes."

Although he had his back to his friend as he went to grab his helmet, Kunsel could hear the confusion in his friend's voice and didn't even have to turn around to know that he was scratching his head during the last part of what he'd said. Shrugging, he stuck his helmet on his head, endured the good-natured pat on it that Zack _always_ gave him, and followed his friend as he bounced his way out of the apartment.

As they walked they chatted idly for a while about nothing in particular, before falling into a casual silence as friends do. Kunsel smiled to himself as he watched Zack strolling along with the usual spring to his every step and grinning at the people they walked past. His smile only grew wider yet though, when Zack started humming the song they'd just been watching. After as few moments, they were both singing along under their breath and Zack had even broke out some dance moves as they walked. It was as he was doing a backwards moon-walk though, that Angeal walked out of his apartment carrying a box and collided with him. Zack staggered to one side, sniggering at the way Kunsel snapped to attention and turned to face his mentor.

"Hey Angeal! What'cha doing?"

Angeal nodded at Kunsel to stand at ease, and put down the box he was holding by the door next to a collection of similar boxes. He couldn't help but smile a little at Zack's carefree nature, and he resisted the urge to ruffle his jet spikes as they swayed with the way he rocked on his feet. A voice emerged from behind him before he could answer though, and Genesis appeared in the doorway carrying yet another box and a lazy smile on his face.

"We're moving you out, _Puppy_."

Angeal sighed at him, and took the box from him so that he could go and get another, albeit reluctantly, and turned to face Zack. His student had stopped rocking for once, and was instead stood with his head titled, his eyebrows drawn down in a frown.

"Huh?"

Angeal shifted his gaze over to Kunsel and quietly ordered him inside to help Genesis finish bringing the boxes out, before looking back at his pupil. Zack watched his friend go, his expression not changing and then looked up at Angeal with a sad light in his eyes.

"You're not....getting rid of me...Are you?" His voice was small and wavered slightly as he spoke, eyes dropping to the floor as he finished.

He didn't want Angeal to stop mentoring him. Sure, he knew he could be a pain in the ass sometimes, and that his concentration span was still little better than a squirrel's, but he was really trying! He had enjoyed his time with Angeal, he r_eally_ had, and he didn't want it to end. Plus Angeal had seemed less exasperated by his antics of late and seemed quietly pleased with his progress, which just made him strive all the more to be even better.

Angeal's heart clenched as Zack spoke and he swiftly enveloped him in a tight hug, surprising at even himself, but looking at Zack's crumpled face was just too much to bear.

"No Zack, I'll never stop mentoring you. How could you think that?" He stepped back a little, ducking his head to study Zack's surprised expression. "We just thought it'd be quicker to pack for you, because you're going to move into my apartment, to see if it benefits the mentoring programme further."

Zack's mouth was a little 'o', suddenly widening into a brilliant smile as he threw himself at Angeal and whooped.

"Angeal, man, you're the best!"

His mentor allowed himself a small smile as he swayed from the added weight, relieved to see the shine back in the depths of blue of Zack's eyes, and patted him on the back before setting him back down.

"How touching. An old dog and a puppy, soon to be sharing a kennel." Came the smug voice floating from the doorway, and Zack peered around Angeal to beam at the red-head.

"Hell yeah! It's gonna be so awesome. OH! Can we have a party Angeal?! Not a big one, just a little one? Please?" Zack gave him his best 'puppy dog eyes', careful not to ruin it by smirking when Angeal's frown faltered a little and he sighed.

"We'll see, Pup." He looked over his shoulder at the still smirking form of his friend, leant up against the doorframe with his arms folded and legs crossed and asked, "Is that all of the boxes now, Gen?"

The red-head nodded, unravelling himself from his position and moving over to Kunsel to help start moving the boxes to Angeal's apartment.

"We'll take these over and meet you there, Angeal."

The other First nodded, he and his pupil watching them go in silence before looking down at Zack.

"Is it ok for me to...er...say bye...to my apartment?" Zack asked awkwardly, smiling sheepishly and rubbing the back of his neck.

Angeal's eyes gentled and he gave the Second a push towards the door, moving over to the boxes and beginning to sort the remaining ones. Zack muttered a 'thanks' and stepped into his now empty apartment. It was strange, seeing everything so open and uncluttered by his things, but a thrum of excitement travelled through him at living with Angeal and he smiled fondly, looking around at all of the memories of this space in his head.

"Bye apartment. I hope you get a nice new owner!" He chuckled to himself, shaking his head at his own childishness and looked up to see Angeal stood waiting just outside the door holding a pile of boxes.

"Ready, pup?"

Zack grinned cockily and puffed out his chest, walking into the corridor and closing the door behind him.

"I was born ready, man."

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

Genesis and Kunsel noted Zack and Angeal's arrival by Zack dropping his boxes just inside the door and bounding into the bedroom, narrowly missing Kunsel, and launching himself onto the bed with a yell. Angeal would have face-palmed, had he not still been holding onto his boxes at the time, so he settled for a sigh and a shake of his head. He seemed to do that a lot where Zack was concerned. Genesis glanced over at him with an amused smirk.

"Still think this is a good idea, Angeal? Imagine what he'll be like at Christmas or birthdays, waking you up at 4am by jumping up and down on your bed shrieking at the top of his voice."

Another context entirely somehow managed to link itself to that image in Angeal's mind and he cleared his throat to hide his sudden discomfort.

"Well at least I won't blast him with a Firaga for waking me up, unlike _some_ people." He muttered gruffly and set down his load.

Genesis just laughed in reply and smiled at the memory of Sephiroth's magical 'haircut', before strolling into Zack's new bedroom and casually watching him wrestle with Kunsel on the bed in a renewed pillow fight. His sharp blue eyes held their usual languid amusement as he leant against the doorframe, looking back over his shoulder to see Angeal beginning to unpack Zack's things, and then returning his gaze to the pair on the bed at a particularly loud yelp. He chuckled to himself, his auburn hair fluttering with the movement, looking over Zack who was now lying on the floor still clutching onto his pillow. Something next to Zack caught his eye though and there was a sharp intake of breath.

"Oh-my-god, shoes!"

Both Kunsel and Zack paused, Zack tilting his head back to stare in disbelievingly at the man above him. There was a pause as Angeal crossed the room to see what had caused the sudden quiet, and Zack opened his mouth to let loose a loud bark of laughter, but upon seeing Angeal, he attempted to smother it and ended up making an odd strangled noise. Genesis ignored this, whilst Angeal frowned at Zack, and instead knelt down next to Zack's prone body and picked up a pair of shoes that had tumbled from a fallen box after Zack had knocked it over.

"How did you get these? These shoes are like $300!"

Kunsel was immediately glad for his helmet as he bit his lip to avoid laughing, bowing his head to hide the rapidly growing smile. Zack, however, saw an opportunity and grinned mischievously as he sat up.

"You should get 'em." A brief pause as he heard Kunsel stifle a snort behind him, and watched Genesis turn over the black and white dress shoes in his hands, smoothing his fingers across the fine leather from Costa del Sol. "Although....I think you have too many shoes."

Genesis looked up sharply, glaring at Zack before responding with a heated "Shut up! You can never have too many shoes!" and returning to study the pair he was holding, smiling in wonder.

Kunsel coughed, his shoulder shaking slightly and shuffled backwards off the other side of the bed to begin unpacking more of Zack's things, hoping to distract himself from the too good to be true scenario behind him.

"Can I try them on?"

Zack's smile grew deeper at the hopeful question, his eyes glinting purple as he held Genesis' gaze.

"Sure thing." He watched in silence as Genesis sat down properly on the floor, quickly removing his leather boots and beginning to put the shoe on. "Erm...this style runs small. I don't think you're gonna fit. I mean you're feet are kinda...big."

Zack almost regretted saying it, but only almost. The muffled snort from behind him and the raised eyebrow from Angeal was worth it, even when faced with a furious red-head who tended to get a bit trigger-happy with fire spells. He gulped as Genesis burnt a hole through him with his fiery stare and growled a "Fuck you!". Zack spluttered then, falling back onto the floor howling with laughter, while the other Second desperately tried to smother his own laughter into his turtleneck collar, but then again Zack wasn't the brightest crayon in the box when it came to Genesis and pissing him off.

Confused and startled at the unexpected reaction to his fury, the First Class blinked and looked over to Angeal with an expression that clearly said _'What in Gaia is wrong with him?!'_. The younger of the two simply shot Zack a bewildered look and stepped forward to take the shoes from Genesis, placing them back in the box. Genesis resisted the urge to shout "Those shoes are mine, betch!" and instead shoved his boots back on, albeit with an elegant flourish, and stalked out of the room, his leather trenchcoat snapping behind him and Angeal following.

They arrived in the living room to find Sephiroth surveying the unorganised arrangement of boxes, and he narrowed his eyes slightly at the scowl plastered across Genesis' usually smirking face. He was about to ask what was wrong, when music drifted through the room and Zack could be heard singing "Shoes. Shoes. Shoes. Oh my god, shoes! Let's get some shoes." The scowl twisted and Genesis threw his arms up in the air shouting "What the hell is that?!"

Sephiroth merely raised an eyebrow and calmly imparted his knowledge on the matter.

"I believe that is a popular internet craze at the moment, a song called 'Shoes'. I have heard some of the Third Classes singing it in the corridors. Why?"

Genesis bristled at the composed, authorative voice of his friend and simply glanced side-long to Angeal.

"It doesn't matter, Seph." He sighed, noting his silver-haired friend's imperceptible nod of his head, and flung himself wearily onto the couch. "Get me a drink, Angeal."

The dark-haired First smiled at his friend's overly dramatic antics, motioning for Sephiroth to take a seat and went to find the whisky. Zack was still singing and Kunsel was still laughing, and Angeal found himself wondering what the hell he had gotten himself into.


End file.
